A Cry For Justice

Awakening the Evangelical Church to Domestic Violence and Abuse in its Midst

Prayer Requests

We at A Cry For Justice desire to come along side those of you who have been wounded by abuse. We strive to do this through our teachings and through praying for the victims that we are aware of. If you wish to remain anonymous, please feel free to do so.  Leave prayer requests in the comments section below.  If you would like to read previous years’ requests and comments click on one of the two links below.

Prayer Requests 2013

Prayer Requests 2012

Some of ACFJ survivors have told us how God lead them to freedom from their abusive marriages.  We have compiled those testimonies here.  May you be encouraged!

Testimonies

44 Comments

  1. Psalm 37

    My dear Summer, you and I must be dealing with the same evil, unfair judge. I’ve been stuck with the same smug jerk for five years and have been revictimized by him every time I have to go before him. The ex is a self-employed plumber who this judge never requires to provide proof of income other than the obviously doctored (and very deficient) bank statements. I absolutely know the exhaustion you feel having to deal with this. It’s come to the point that I feel like this judge and the ex are two playground bullies attacking me, and I cry for help but nobody makes the suffering and hurt stop. I wish God would give both of us justice this year.

    • Summer

      Dear Ps. 37. I was going to write a prayer request and came here and you had written something. I just spent an hour pouring everything out but I removed it because no can do anything, only God can and He doesn’t want to, never has, and it is not a season like people keep saying on the radio and in books; it has been my whole life. Thank you for praying. It means a lot that someone might actually understand. My ex is an ATC and 4th man at last place of work, 2nd at previous place to abuse wife and abandon her and force her to file for divorce for some sort of support, so the lawyers said, what they meant was the wife sees no support period but the lying lawyers and the lying judge get tons of money. All six of them have moved up into management. Found out the judges keep postponing to keep filing their EIN number to make more money. But the worst is the constant constant lies and they are so good at it, there is no way to refute anything and I had witnesses for everything absolutely everything and in the courtroom and the judge has ignored it because he can. And ex is a christian. His family is a christian. The only 50% decent judges were the ones for the OPs. They actually admitted the evidence was beyond doubt (this divorce judge would have ignored it as he undid about ten OPs the day I was to go before him). Do you know I told the pastor’s wife that last year I was living in a “sort of prison”, I told her that last year things were not well in the marriage, I told others hints. No one wanted to hear and she and her husband ended up trying to help get the OP removed. They didn’t settle anything; made another hearing day to check on ‘progress in two months’ for something I was told should have taken one week six months ago. Anyway this has become so abbreviated all the context is missing-
      rather, Thank you to all of you praying.

    • Summer

      I am sorry about yesterday’s down response. I had just gotten another answer from the lawyer who earlier said we could get the support from ex, now back to saying we can’t get it direct deposited without ex say so and still more job nos. I am so grateful to all (Barbara, IAMB, Pastor C, TPW, AITT,Ps. 37…) of you for praying. Everything is so constantly confusing. I even once again started the read thru the Bible in a year which I have completed every year for years. But the harder I try to make sense of all this, the less anything makes sense.

      • Dear Summer and Psalm 37, your voices on this blog are important. Here’s why, and I’m quoting from an email I received recently from a woman who supports a survivor:

        “I’ve heard that when an elected official receives a letter from a constituent it is said to represent 1000 other voices that haven’t written. I must believe that when I see letters written to blogs from women in such obvious pain from the unseen abuse of a “Christian” husband those letters, too, represent 1000 other voices too frightened, too restricted and/or too despondent and without hope to write a letter themselves.”

        So let’s do that maths. We have Summer and Psalm 37 sharing their stories of being horribly treated by their two respective judges in the family court. That suggests we have potentially 2000 other readers or would be readers with similar stories, who are not sharing on this blog but they may be reading it and will be encouraged as they will know know they are not alone when they read your stories.

      • Jesus' Chosen Beloved Little Lamb

        Dear Jeff, Barbara, Sarah, and other trusted, faithful, fervent prayer warriors,

        Thanks so much for continuing to pray for me! I was so grieved today as the Lord showed me my shame in my sin of idolatry/codependency – trusting in man and looking to man to protect me and my children. The Truth (Jesus) set me free again. My Heavenly Father will protect me and hold my hand, but I keep letting go. God is faithful, and sadly, I am not. The Holy Spirit reminded me of Psalm 73:23-28, “Nevertheless I am continually with thee: thou hast held me by my right hand. Thou shalt guide me with thy counsel, and afterward receive me to glory. Whom have I in heaven but thee? and there is none upon earth that I desire beside thee. My flesh and my heart faileth: but God is the strength of my heart, and my portion for ever. For, lo, they that are far from thee shall perish: thou hast destroyed all them that go whoring from thee. But it is good for me to draw near to God: I have put my trust in the Lord GOD, that I may declare all thy works.” Please pray that I would trust that my Heavenly Father will protect me, and as I hold His hand that I would listen to Him as He has told me no more and that I need to set boundaries. Over 10 years ago, the Holy Spirit revealed to me who my violator was and that I was sleeping with the Enemy. Thanks for the warning not to do couple’s counseling. Sadly, the other day my abuser joined my safe doctor’s appointment, and took control and won again. I’m tired of my abuser controlling and winning as I suffer more damage. Please pray that I would stay close to my Heavenly Father as He teaches me how to set boundaries. Any counsel you may have on boundaries would also be helpful. Btw, I set boundaries the other day and my abuser got so angry. Then, my Heavenly Father reminded me that when boundaries are set the abuser will get angrier.

        Please pray for my Heavenly Father to protect me as I give this note tomorrow:

        I have been in a difficult spiritual warfare trial since 01/12/14. After my husband/violator spiritually abused me with medication, the Truth (Jesus) set me free. My Heavenly Father said no more; He has been teaching me to set boundaries. The Holy Spirit convicted me to accept that I have been abused (off-and-on 26+ years emotional, psychological, and verbal abuse, off-and-on 21 years sexual abuse, almost 15 years spiritual abuse, 10+ years medication abuse, and at times financial abuse). The spiritual abuse = lies, deceit, modern day patriarchy movement (my husband/violator causes me fear by controlling, manipulating, intimidating, oppressing and threatening me in the name of submission to him and that God will bless me for submitting; twisting Scripture to keep me dependent on him and helpless.

        My husband/violator is counseling with a Biblical Marriage Counselor. The counselor said that in order for me to heal my husband (and others) needs to stop hurting me. The counselor contacted me via email and was very sensitive to me and the Lord gave me His peace to write my testimony of the last 26 years to the counselor and his wife only. God used one of His children to advise me not to do couple’s counseling (see attached article) as the abuser often controls and wins again and the abused/oppressed/afflicted receives more damaging abuse. So, in order to preserve what little bit left I have as a person, my Heavenly Father said no more and that I cannot counsel with you and my abuser/violator.

        “For unto you it is given in the behalf of Christ, not only to believe on him, but also to suffer for his sake;” Philippians 1:29

        “For even, hereunto were ye called: because Christ also suffered for us, leaving us an example, that ye should follow his steps:” 1 Peter 2:21

        “… but committed himself to him that judgeth righteously.” 1 Peter 2:23c

        “But rejoice, inasmuch as ye are partakers of Christ’s sufferings; that, when his glory shall be revealed, ye may be glad also with exceeding joy… Yet if any man suffer as a Christian, let him not be ashamed; but let him glorify God on this behalf… Wherefore, let them that suffer according to the will of God commit the keeping of their souls to him in well-doing, as unto a faithful Creator.” 1 Peter 4:13, 16, 19

  2. Wife & Mom of Marines

    Barbara, in the effort to show abused women (I am not–but I support an abuse survivor) how the enemy of our souls works to keep us in bondage by making people think they are alone in their struggles, I share this story.

    Years ago I was battling suicidal thoughts and I knew it wasn’t “me”. It isn’t in my nature nor in line with my spiritual maturity, nor a product of a critical situation or environment. One of the enemy’s biggest tactics is to attack, but then keep us from speaking out either through fear, social stigma or embarrassment. I knew it was an out and out attack made by the enemy but it was a stupid move—he might be able to pull that one off on a baby Christian or someone with an emotional propensity to fall victim to those lies, but I wasn’t that person. I knew who I was in Christ. I knew where those thoughts came from. I knew I had an enemy trying to wage war against me. I knew where to go to find someone to join forces with me to expose and defeat the enemy’s attack. I recognized the battle didn’t just involve me. With the same mind pictures of the 1000 letters illustration you quoted above I knew there were others in our local church body that the enemy was hitting with this, not just me. People who wouldn’t come forward, who wouldn’t seek help, those who would fear being stigmatized as a ‘mental case’ instead of being supported as a victim of satanic wiles and those who would think it was ‘just them’ instead of recognizing the attack of the evil one.

    With that in mind (that 1 person speaking out represents 1000 others or is merely the tip of the iceberg) I went that Sunday morning and informed our pastor. From the platform that morning he prayerfully and decidedly dealt with that spiritual onslaught publicly rebuking those spirits that were attacking the sheep. I’ve never had a problem with it since and I was comforted knowing that my recognizing the assault for what it truly was, speaking out and having our pastor expose and crush it, resulted in others being saved from more damage. The enemy overplayed his hand when he chose me to be the target of those suicidal fiery darts!

    Therefore, the moral of this story is SPEAK OUT! #1. You are NOT alone. #2. You will be used to rescue others and in the midst of it gain freedom for yourself.

    • Thanks Wife&Mom, that is a terrific story. And what a great pastor. He didn’t say you were sinning by having suicidal thoughts. He didn’t tell you that there must be something wrong with your faith. He didn’t guilt you at all. Instead, he believed you and stood with you and rebuked the cause of the problem. Good stuff!

  3. G. F. Mom

    Please pray for me. I am struggling with the fact that I am abused and the other night I woke him up at 3 in the morning and told him how I was feeling but I was scared, almost shaking to tell him. He kindly responded but this kindness has gone on for weeks since he saw a therapist off and on for a month and took a stress leave. I have the symptoms of his abuse by his procrastinating, forgetfulness, tiredness and overall apathy. I see everything going against me financially. My mom’s house is the only place that has room for us but she can be emotionally controlling and guilt me if I don’t go back to the Mormon church. Pray that my husband really works on himself because he tends to procrastinate things a lot and pacify him and me. He can be very charismatic so my parents will think I am making too much of the situation as well as our 5 children. They adore their daddy. My husband is being a prince charming right now but I think he stuffs down my mistakes and I am too depressed to do a good job of meals and housekeeping. I feel like I am still walking on eggshells because I think he’s thinking I’m “milking it.” The other day he got an anxiety attack because he couldn’t find his medicine but it lasted a few seconds and he gained composure. I told him to get evaluated for anger and I am getting evaluated too. Please pray that we can fix it or that God has a plan.

  4. kereena

    i have a prayer reqest. could you good people pray for 2 storms in my life.

    first is my family my teen daugher is very hard work at the moment wont take authority from me or her school i am waiting to hear whether she can be accomodated she is now with her maternal gran. but she can have have her long term. my younger son is staying with me.. she is into street life at only 14 and drugs ect and vilent towards me and my mum who i also look after and my son as been suject to her behaveor too. she needs more help that i can give her. the other thing is i am not able to settle into a church that will accept us and feel so stigmaed out by my current church because in order for me now due to intimadation i am suffering by one leader and because of my own problems i am not alowed to go to any groups where she is she is a pastoral carer of the church runds lots of choirs not just though church and prayer meetings ect all because i wanted and needed a friend i thought she would help me but my crisis in my family no one wants to be friend me or get invoved. i have no one close to talk to i live in a small town where the groups i was attending i can not less i have a suppott worker with me as there poliscys are ver different to other churches i have attended more so i feel belittled because of my disibility too i have aspergers but i lead a perfectly normal life. i am a christian and that is the one thing i can hold on too.

    my son when he finds out will be dispointed he can not attend church with me and my mum too we are christains and been baptist but my daugher is of the rails and i have no friends to support me so i asak for your prayer as i take the matter up with the church a little more i took it first to the rev of the church no i need to go to the prest and go higher up as formal complaint on disibilty discrimanation i got no idea what i am doing but i can not go through life with out standing up for me and my family at the moment i can do with prayers to sort this out. i thought this church would have accepted all things but as my life gets harder i find they back off. and lots of misunderstandings and they always call a socail worker when all i need is a nice cup of tea a chat and to pray with some one. but when i ask that they think i need profectial help too so i ahve to stop this sitgma with in the church so it does not happen to another family with so many problems and disabilitys. i hope you can pray for this if any one has any ideas what i can or can not do with regards to the church and my family i thought once as i have a elder boy whos mid 20s years ago you would get teen support advice and prayer from your local church but i feel it as started to change with new poliscys in place to protect children and vonarble adults some how i do not understand it all myself. thanks

    • I shall pray for you, Kereena.

      • Jesus'ChosenBelovedLittle Lamb

        The Lord led me to your website last week. For my safety, please do not email me since my husband and I receive our emails on each of our computers. Thanks. As the Lord allows, I hope to share more with you, but for now, please pray for the Lord to protect me as I have had increasingly strong spiritual attacks for over a week. Over a week ago, the Truth (Jesus) set me free. The Holy Spirit has been telling me for many years; I keep getting deceived, and I need to flee from idolatry/codependency. Jesus has been holding me close to Him. But, Satan doesn’t want me to get help. I need the Lord’s protection for at least the next 10 days to make it to an important doctor’s appointment. “For thy Maker is thine husband; the LORD of hosts is his name; and thy Redeemer the Holy One of Israel; The God of the whole earth shall he be called. For the LORD hath called thee as a woman forsaken and grieved in spirit, and a wife of youth, when thou wast refused, saith thy God.” Isaiah 54:5-6 The Lord placed it on my heart to call on you as trusted, faithful, fervent prayer warriors as you understand more than the few trusted, faithful fervent prayer warriors who are already crying out to the Lord to protect me. “The righteous cry, and the LORD heareth, and delivereth them out of all their troubles. The LORD is nigh unto them that are of a broken heart; and saveth such as be of a contrite spirit. Many are the afflictions of the righteous: but the LORD delivereth him out of them all.” Psalm 34:17-19 Thanks for praying for the Lord to protect me.

      • Jeff Crippen

        Prayer request received, Lamb.

      • Dear Lamb, I am praying.
        So glad you have found our blog. And thanks for letting us know not to email you.

  5. Sarah

    Dear Lamb I will pray for you too. Much love from a sister in Christ

  6. Been a bit… but needing prayer right now. My husband and I have been separated for almost 10 months now. I feel like maybe he will file for divorce soon. I am not ready. My emotions have been up and down. I’ll think that I’m okay, and than burst into tears at the most unexpected moments. My son and I are getting our own place (been staying with others) in just over a month. One moment I’m excited, the next I’m terrified. When I go to bed, my mind is racing. The court process has been horribly re victimizing and I don’t think that’s helping my mood. I don’t think I can DO anymore. I feel like I’m as stable as I can expect to be during this time and it’s not good enough. I cry out to the Lord…. all day long. But it’s so hard. I just want to forget what’s going on for a little bit. It’s exhausting.

    • I shall pray.

    • xmeri — I don’t know whether this may come across as patronizing, if so trash it, but the Serenity Prayer came to mind when I read your request.

      God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

  7. Thank you for praying. I certainly could use some serenity right now :). I’d say the stuff stressing me out falls under the “cannot change” category. However, I do know that with time all this will calm down and that I will heal. It’s just hard getting through it- so yes, I need some serenity as I struggle through this! Thank you :).

    • Jesus'ChosenBelovedLittle Lamb

      Thanks so much for praying… my Heavenly Father has protected me so far. I still have 5 nights and 6 days until my important doctor’s appointment, so please continue to pray for my Heavenly Father to continue to protect me and that I would keep fleeing/repenting from idolatry/codependency. Years ago, the Holy Spirit revealed to me that I have been living Revelation 12 for the past 11+ years. Jesus has been holding me close to Him as I grieve and hurt physically, emotionally, and spiritually. My Heavenly Father heard our cries. I told my husband that my Heavenly Father said no more, and that after 10+ years of difficult spiritual warfare trials, he has to take care of his wife and children who are grieving and enduring a great deal of stress and need to rest in bed… a postpartum recovery. Jesus said, “My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in necessities, in persecutions, in distresses for Christ’s sake: for when I am weak, then am I strong.” 2 Corinthians 12:9-10 Thanks for fervently praying for my Heavenly Father to protect me and my children as we have been deceived by Satan’s lies.

      • Jesus' Chosen Beloved Little Lamb

        Again, thanks so much for praying… my Heavenly Father has protected me so far. By God’s grace and mercy, I made it to today for my important doctor’s appointment Please continue to pray for my Heavenly Father to continue to protect me and that I would keep fleeing/repenting from idolatry/codependency. I know that my Heavenly Father has heard my cries and my children’s cries. Please pray that He would work through authorities to deliver us from captivity and free us from bondage from the modern day patriarchy movement cult/idolatry in our homechurch fellowship, who the Holy Spirit revealed to me are actually followers of Satan. I, too, was deceived by Satan’s lies and followed patriarchy to the point of 26+ years of abuse (psychological, emotional, sexual, and spiritual) until the point of spiritual murder. It was Satan, but Jesus gave me His peace that the Truth (Jesus) has set me free. So, my Heavenly Father says no more. I am a daughter of the King of Kings and Lord of Lords. Please pray for my children, especially my oldest son, Satan has deceived him through his father’s lies and deceit and the lies and deceits of the cult of the patriarchy movement in our homechurch fellowship. I desire for my children to know the truth, and be around others who know the truth and our Christ-like. “The righteous cry, and the LORD heareth, and delivereth them out of all their troubles. The LORD is nigh unto them that are of a broken heart; and saveth such as be of a contrite spirit. Many are the afflictions of the righteous: but the LORD delivereth him out of them all.” (Psalm 34:17-19)

      • Jeff Crippen

        Lamb – Persevere! You are seeing more and more truth. Seeing the idolatry and co-dependency is huge!

  8. Thanks for the update Little Lamb. I shall keep praying.

    • Anna in the temple

      Dear little Lamb

      I am so sad at the years of abuse you have gone through. That was never God’s plan for a marriage. It sounds horrendous. I will keep praying for you. Ps my hands are very sore so just a short reply

  9. collums74

    Please pray that God will protect my children from their abusive father. He left a loaded gun on our porch and rang the doorbell for the kids to find it. I’m afraid the courts are going to give him unsupervised visitation. Please pray. I have 5 kids and I need prayer. Thank you

    • Collums
      I shall pray and am praying. I also strongly suggest (if you’re not doing it already) that you seek help and safe refuge for you and your kids. This behavior by your abuser show that you and the kids are at high risk of a lethal outcome.

      Please check out our Hotlines Page and our Safety Planning page for lots of links, especially this one which I am copying and pasting here:

      Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit also known as DOCUMENT THE ABUSE

      Ensure that a victim’s words about her fears and previous violence will not disappear if she does.
      A victim can make an Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit (EAA) to document her experiences in ways that will help the legal system successfully prosecute in the future, even if she is disappeared, dead or in a coma.
      The process combines video taping of the victim’s actual words attesting to the abuse, coupled with witnessed and notarized legal documents that successfully satisfy legal hurdles often faced in intimate partner violence and stalking cases.
      A unique packaging of testimony + documentation + perpetrator historical profiling + pre-collected evidence delivered to established safe and legal persons = a delicate issue brilliantly wrapped up for successful prosecution.

    • anonymous

      Praying (((( ))))

  10. Anonymous

    So many decisions, so many voices. Pray that as I continue to meet with counselors that I will be able to discern the Lord’s truth and even if it is painful that I would have the strength and courage to obey His Word. Pray especially for pastor/shepherds; that their hearts would be open to ‘protecting all the sheep’.
    A note of praise for ACFJ … I have been making others aware of your ministry. Yesterday, a woman came and hugged me; asked how I was doing and then proceeded to rejoice and explain how she had finally convinced one of her girlfriends to take control of an abusive situation. She recommended her friend link up to ACFJ. Hearing of others experiences was enough to convince this woman that she had to take action … the fog was lifted.

    • Jesus' Chosen Beloved Little Lamb

      I made the mistake of going to a marital counseling session with my abuser and he managed to get the counselor to minimize my perceived abuse so he keeps lording that over me. He did exactly what you said he would do with his power and control over. I tried to set boundaries, but he continued in our van with our children. He is abusive to me and our children, but he is a master at POWER AND CONTROL, MINIMIZING, DENYING, AND BLAMING, making light of the abuse and not taking my concerns about it seriously; saying the abuse didn’t happen; shifting responsibility for abusive behavior; saying I am an abuser.

      I need to keep fleeing/continually repenting of idolatry/codependency and keep crying out to my chief Shepherd. Please pray that He will hear my cries and deliver my children and me from bondage and captivity to evil. The parenting style that God led me to keeps my children close to me. He has likened me to a shepherd obeying the voice of my chief Shepherd and protecting my flock from the wolves.

      I was hoping this article on “ABUSE PROTECTION from Meier Clinics was going to help us, but it didn’t”

      The only time we are ever told to “turn the other cheek” is when we are slapped on our cheek for being a believer. Otherwise, God absolutely hates all forms of abuse and wants and expects us to protect others and ourselves from abuse. In Romans 12, God promises to get vengeance on all abusers— although His timing is not always immediate like we sometimes wish it was. In Psalm 68, we are reminded how much God loves us, and especially “widows and orphans” which also includes psychological “widows and orphans” who have husbands/fathers who ignore or abuse them. God promises to take the lonely and place them in new “families”—other believers who will love us and
      treat us with dignity and accept us the way we are. God also warns abusers in Psalm 68, promising to eventually smash their heads against the rocks. Like I said, God gets really angry at any form of abuse against His children”

      My abuser is scared that I am telling lies about him that he is an abuser. Please pray that I would stay under the protection of my Heavenly Father as He has told me to cry out for justice. Jesus said, “Be not afraid, but speak, and hold not thy peace: For I am with thee, and no man shall set on thee to hurt thee: for I have much people in this city.” Acts 18:9b-10

      • Dear Little Lamb, I removed some of the text of your comment because it could have identified you to those who know you. Please do be careful — this is a public blog and anyone can read it.

        I do hear your pain and your struggles. If I may, I’d like to suggest a few ideas for you to consider:

        Sometimes victims leave their abusers and then feel that God is telling them to return to the abuser. Almost universally, this ends up with the abuser getting more entrenched in abusive behaviours and the victim becoming even more downtrodden and exhausted and psychologically shredded and her health gets even more compromised. I suggest you might like to consider that it may not be the Holy Spirit which prompts victims to return to their unreformed abusers, rather, it’s things like false guilt, wrong understanding of the doctrines of suffering, persecution, forgiveness, divorce, etc., and pressure from kids/extended family/friends/Church networks. And fear. Fear of all sorts of things, some of which are very valid fears and some of which are probably not valid.

        I suggest you stop trying to explain to your abuser that he is abusive and what he does that is abusive. He is clearly unwilling to listen and take it on board, he just uses all your explanations and advice about how he needs to repent by turning them back into boomerang weapons to throw back at you. It is a waste of time explaining things to an abuser. Try not to fall into the explaining trap.

        Don’t bother with reading any resources other than what we list on our Resources pages. We have vetted these resources carefully.

        I suggest you make a secret list (so your abuser can’t see it). On one side of the paper list all the reasons why you think you ought to stay with your abuser, and on the other side list all the reasons why it might be a good idea to leave. You might like to think that through by asking yourself “What am I afraid of if I stay? What am I afraid of if I were to leave?”

        I strongly suggest you phone the Hotline and ask them to put you in touch with your local domestic abuse support service. Here is out Hotlines page and our Safety Planning page. I believe your are in danger and at quite high risk, from what you described. You could do the Mosaic Method Risk Assessment to find out your level of risk.

        Idolatry of one’s husband is dangerous, no husband is sinless, and abusive husbands are outright evil. To repent of making an idol of your husband, or making an idol of cultish Christian teachings, means to cast out their directives, resist and refuse to believe the false guilt and commandments they lay on you, and removing yourself from their infection. No one can easily repent of such idolatry while remaining in the atmosphere where all that idolatry is promoted and enforced. You are not made of titanium. You are, like all of us, a frail creature — we all get affected by false teaching if we sit under it and remain in its influence. The only way to really clear it out of our brains and souls is to flee. Come out from Babylon. Do not expect yourself to be able to sit in that poisoned atmosphere and be able to resist and reject its toxicity. All it will do is drag you down more into the black hole, deplete your energy and health and render you even less able to find the strength to walk away.

        Hugs from Barb

  11. Anonymous

    Barbara — Excellent counsel to Little Lamb and all of us. The ‘fear factor’ is an issue that we sometimes don’t want to admit to because as believers we keep reminding ourselves of how much we ‘trust God for every situation’. I can relate to, “Do not expect yourself to be able to sit in that poisoned atmosphere and be able to resist and reject it’s toxicity. All it will do is drag you down more into black hole, deplete your energy and health and render you even less able to find the strength to walk away.”
    Once again, I commend you on such wise counsel.

  12. Anna in the temple

    Dear Lamb

    I agree with Barb. I’m worried for you too and I agree it sounds like you are in danger. Barb made good suggestions especially re ringing a hotline. Do be careful if you make a list. I did something like that once and then dropped it accidentally.

    I will keep you in prayer

  13. Summer

    Please pray, been tense for couple weeks now, 8:30 with judge and lawyer and perhaps ex and all it will be is more abuse, perfect day to say ‘no I won’t enforce what legally I am supposed to enforce’ is what the judge will probably say tomorrow’ Valentines’ hurray since he has gone against other laws every time so far. And then another mtg. with same judge two mondays later same time. Thanks for praying.

  14. anonymous

    Pleading for prayers please-esp for covering for my kids. He is threatening that things are going to change in a “big way” and talking about custody/taking the kids. I can put up with anything-. anything but loosing the kids to him. I’ve ben staying just so they wont have to do un-supervised visits. My church has failed me. He has secret accounts where I know he has been hiding money, and i have no access to funds for a lawyer. I don’t know what to do. My heart is breaking.

    • I shall pray. The situation you are facing is one many victims have faced. . . the threats are awful. I shall pray that God will not allow the abuser’s threats to be fulfilled, and that God will work all things together for you and your children’s good. :)

  15. Nowfree

    I’m praying for you and your children, Anonymous.

  16. Please pray for me as I meet with a pastor at my church today. He is someone recommended to me by several friends at my church, some of which he counseled through their divorce. I feel fairly confident that he will be supportive of the decision I have felt in my heart for the past month or so: to divorce. Still, I’m a bit nervous. I recognize that ultimately this decision is between me and God, and that a pastor is not perfect. However, it would bring me so much more confidence knowing that my church is standing behind my decision. Please pray that God will be present in our meeting and make His will extremely clear to both of us.

    • I shall pray XMeri. Your comment came through okay. We moderate all comments before publishing them so that’s why it didn’t go live straight away.
      (hugs)

  17. Usually I can see it with a “Your Comment is Awaiting Moderation” message… but this time I couldn’t see it at all, so that’s why I was confused :). Thank you for the prayer!

  18. Marah

    I’ve just found this site today, after being on an intense search for truth and wisdom regarding my situation for the last 8-10 weeks. My husband is out of the home because of my insistence (years of off and on deceit surrounding alcohol abuse). I’m still sorting it all out, trying to understand what seems so good, what’s clearly not good, and what’s just confusing. I’ve not had a job in over 17 years, raising my kids, and am exhausted emotionally and mentally, and have developed chronic health problems in that time. My kids are relieved their dad is out of the house, and don’t currently want to see him, but he isn’t happy about it and wants our family back. I have a fairly new church, which seems to be awesomely supportive and run by truly wise people, but it’s a fair distance away. I need prayer for continued truth to be revealed, wisdom, courage, protection, rest from fear and anxiety, God’s provision with money, health issues, and for my children. Thank you.

    • Jeff Crippen

      Marah – Wonderful that you found us. Thank you for sharing your story (though I am sure there is plenty more to tell as there always is with abuse). There are very good resources listed on our resource page that will help educate you regarding abuse. As I recall, Lundy Bancroft (Why Does He do That?) notes that where there is abuse, alcohol and/or drugs may accentuate it, but they cannot be blamed as the fundamental reason. Abuse is always the result of an inflated sense of entitlement to possession of power and control over others, with a sense of justification for using tactics to gain and maintain that control. Please keep us updated as we pray for you. Many blessings on you and the children in Christ.

  19. Anonymous

    My Temporary Orders hearing is tomorrow. Please pray for God to grant me and the children protection from the abuser, and that the judge will see the clear pattern of abuse and rule in our favor. Because the physical abuse was minimal, we have to show a pattern of the verbal/emotional/psychological abuse, but the weight of my case falls on the long-term sexual abuse which will be hard to talk about in front of him and the others in the courtroom. Please pray for me as I testify; and the children too, as they speak to the judge in regards to what they lived with.

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