Aren’t you making too big a deal of this?
At this blog, we generally keep our focus on domestic abuse, but other kinds of abuse have similar dynamics to domestic abuse. In this post, I’m giving links to an account of sexual harassment by a para-church Leader. It is a two-part testimony by a woman named Lizzie, describing Bill Gothard’s sexual harassment of her while she was a teenager. Some of you may already have seen Lizzie’s account as it was published in April 2012.
Part 1, Exploited Innocence – Sexual Harassment at HQ is Lizzie’s account of the harassment.
When people hear stories of sexual harassment like this, they often respond by minimizing the abuse, excusing the abuser and criticizing the victim.
In Part 2, Aren’t you making too big an issue of this? Lizzie’s explains how she has dealt with such minimization and deflection.
Both Part 1 and Part 2 give valuable insight into the internal reflections that take place in a survivor’s mind –
- as she is being groomed by the abuser
- as she starts to come out of the fog
- as she starts to re-calibrates her thinking so as to properly name what was done to her ( in this case, sexual harassment)
- and as she learns to dismiss all the minimization and excuse-making, and to sheet the blame back onto the abuser where it belongs.
I think our readers here may find validation and good ideas from these two articles, especially Part 2 where she answers the question “Aren’t you making too big an issue of this?”