Thurday Thought — Good Quote on Why Couples Counseling is Wrong for Abuse Cases
The following is quoted from Ruth Tucker’s new book, Black and White Bible, Black and Blue Wife (Zondervan):
Couples counseling or marriage counseling is never an appropriate strategy to address abusive behavior — especially domestic violence,’ writes Terry Moore, a licensed clinical addiction counselor. ‘Resolving the kind of conflicts between people for which couples counseling is intended will not stop one person from abusing the other. Conflict is a pretext for abuse, not a cause of it.’ Having since read up on the subject, these statements sound so obvious. Why wouldn’t I as a smart, educated woman have recognized these truths to be self-evident — for my own declaration of independence?
What Moore writes is so elementary and obvious that I’m almost embarrassed to quote it: ‘Couples counseling depends upon an open dialogue between partners…People who are being hit, intimidated, or controlled through threats or other coercive means by their partners are not free to engage in open dialogue.’ But I wasn’t the only one back then, and even today, who was entirely clueless on this critical matter.
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