Books by Topic: Understanding Domestic Abuse
Note: A Cry For Justice is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Programs, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to amazon.com. For more info, see here.
by Jeff Crippen with Rebecca Davis. Pastor and author Jeff Crippen presents Christ’s body with a work steeped in Scripture that lays before us a map of the abusive mind, the tactics of abuse, the effects abuse has on its victims, and the tragic way our churches have failed the victims of this sin. He issues a clarion call for those who love Christ to answer the call to love the oppressed and speak for the victims – together we can root out the wolves in the midst of the flock and unmask the domestic abuser in the church hiding in our pews.
by Jeff Crippen and Anna Woods
Here is a review of this book by Ps Dave Orrison.
by Lundy Bancroft. This single book will take you far in your journey to wise up to the deceptions of abusers. Note: Bancroft’s books contains some vulgar language because he quotes abusers. An excellent review of this book can be found here.
by Scott A. Johnson. The first resource of its kind, this book addresses the similarities between these overlapping fields. The book’s detailed structure includes information on the psychological, emotional, physical, and sexual facets of the abuse cycle from name-calling, to complete psychological deconstruction, rape, and homicide.
by Leslie Vernick. Recommended apart from the fact that this book does not state categorically that Scripture condones divorce for domestic abuse.
by Patricia Evans. An excellent introduction to the dynamics and different types of verbal abuse. Includes a questionnaire tool to help readers evaluate their own relationships.
Should I Stay or Should I Go?: A Guide to knowing whether your relationship can—and should—be saved.
by Lundy Bancroft and Jac Patrissi.Some bonus materials for this book are freely downloadable. They are designed to print out and give to your partner or ex-partner if he is showing signs of getting serious about working on his behavior and its underlying causes.
Caveat: We have had feedback on this book from a survivor who was in the New Age and Spiritualism before she became Christian. She says the book contains some language and concepts that are reminiscent of New Age teachings. The problems seem to be confined to chapter eight. In that chapter there are visualization exercises, Gestalt type exercises involving referring to oneself in the third person or as two different people, references to ‘energy,’ ‘your best possible self,’ ‘living from your center,’ ‘being grounded,’ and ‘creating a Self-Nurturing Plan.’ So while the book has lots of insight into the questions and situations women battle with in abusive/unhealthy relationships, we suggest readers be discerning while reading it and not take on board or employ the elements of the book that are akin to New Age practices.
The Batterer as Parent: Addressing the Impact of Domestic Violence on Family Dynamics (SAGE Series on Violence against Women)
by Lundy Bancroft. This book will help you understand why abusers parent the way they do and what to expect and be careful of in the abuser’s parenting — post separation. It is written to professionals helping victims so it is more technical and detailed then Lundy’s book When Dad Hurts Mom.
by Lundy Bancroft. Focusing upon the effects on children whose mother is being abused, and teaching her how she can help them, this book is written to survivors and is less technical and detailed as Lundy’s The Batterer as Parent. You will not miss any key points if you only read this book.
by Christi Paul. Here is what one of our readers has said about this book: “When I started to realize that my marriage was abusive this was really helpful because she is a Christian woman and she describes the abuse she suffered at the hands of her first husband who was also an alcoholic. Just one caution though, I found myself saying things like, well he doesn’t do that so maybe it’s not so bad for me etc., but she talks about how she left and what she did to leave and also spends a fair amount of time talking about some therapy that she went through to help heal herself of the verbal abuse she had suffered. I just remember her saying in there, I wasn’t created to be abused. No one is. So many lightbulb moments!”
by Muriel Canfield. The author tells the stories of two Christian survivors, one of whom was married to a pastor, the other to an extreme narcissist.
by Jan Silvious. Building upon the Book of Proverbs in the Bible, Silvious teaches us that abusers (fools) are not your normal brand of sinner and cannot be handled with typical methods we might use for dealing with other people. Caveat: This author says abuse is not grounds for divorce. We disagree with that, but find other useful things in the book.
by Beverly Engel. This book addresses the victim who is also an abuser. [Note: not a Christian book]
by Barrie Levy. Recommended by Lundy Bancroft.
by Barrie Levy and Patricia Occhiuzzo Giggam. Recommended by Lundy Bancroft.
by Ann Rule. A “true-crime” story about real-life abuse by a psychopathic man named Bradly Morris Cunningham who murdered his wife. Free of any restraints of conscience, Cunningham devastated the lives of intelligent, talented women and just about everyone else around him. His ability to deceive and manipulate was incredible.
by Ann Rule. This “true-crime” story is about Bart Corbin, the “handsome twin” responsible for a double homicide that spanned 14 years.
by Susan Greenfield. Survivor account of fleeing from her abusive pastor husband.
by Waneta Dawn. A novel about domestic abuse, where the abuser scarcely shows any physical violence.
Karen McAndless-Davis & Jill Cory. Karen is a Christian but the site is written for non-Christians as it aims to be of assistance to all women. Lundy Bancroft and Jackson Katz endorse the book.
by Dr. Jill Murray. This has been recommended by one of our readers. You can read her comment about the book here.
by Walter S. DeKeseredy and Martin D. Schwartz. Looks at the physical, mental and sexual violence rural women may face when exiting dangerous relationships, after they have left them, or even post-divorce. People are very fond of leveling judgments at women who don’t “just leave” but this book is a timely reminder of the terrorism that serves to frighten women into remaining – and their fear of what may happen if they leave is, as this book shows, not groundless. DeKeseredy and Schwartz explore the danger of sexual assault when a woman “emotionally” separates from a partner – i.e. she does not have to even announce she is leaving; the man just senses she is growing distant and rapes her in order to reassert control and ownership.
The books that follow under this line have not yet been categorized in order of how strongly we recommend them.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
by Ruth A Tucker. Ruth recounts a harrowing story of abuse at the hands of her husband, a well-educated charming preacher no less, in hope that her story would help other women caught in a cycle of domestic violence and offer a balanced biblical approach to counter such abuse for pastors and counselors.
by Patrick Carnes. The author presents an in-depth study of relationships that create trauma bonds, why they form, who is most susceptible, and how they become so powerful. He shows how to recognize when traumatic bonding has occurred and gives a checklist for examining relationships. He then provides steps to safely extricate from these relationships. You can read a review of this book by one of our readers here.
BIFF: Quick Responses to High Conflict People, Their Hostile Emails, Personal Attacks and Social Media Meltdowns.
by Bill Eddy. Written by president and co-founder of High Conflict Institute, Eddy created the BIFF response to protect you and your reputation by responding quickly and civilly to people who treat you rudely — while being reasonable in return. BIFF stands for Brief, Informative, Friendly, and Firm. This little book gives over 20 examples of BIFF responses for all areas of life — plus additional tips to help you deal with high-conflict people anywhere.
This is a PDF created by Olympia Union Gospel Mission. This workbook includes ten biblical studies which focus on understanding the basic dynamics of domestic violence relationships, including verbal abuse.